For discussion on Reddit

I plan to put this on Reddit, and I’m interested in what discussion it might bring. Any comments would be helpful to me.

My little path

I have never joined any group or taken vows. Except that I majored in engineering, and made a living in it. But family tragedies exposed the peripheral nature of that, and the need for something deeper and more comprehensive about life, which engineering didn’t begin to approach. That drew me to religion, philosophy, and psychology - and in the midst of that, meditation - but without a teacher. I came to several notions about technique, and one day, sat cross legged to begin. I sat for two hours. And then, two hours every day for years, and still now, after more than 50 years, I meditate more than two hours every day. Instead of a beginning, it seems like I was just continuing what I had done - as in a previous life. But who knows. Early on, I did work specifically with two different group - with each for about five years. But no vows, no exclusivity. And it feels like that was just right for me. In fact, in the explosion between my parents, which has forever burdened us all in my family, I was two years old, and have my first memory. Lying in my crib, I felt being alone would be central in my life. And it has worked out - with more depth than I would have had from more pleasant origins. Now it seems there are benefits and burdens of a solitary path. Instead of the support of a vast and unified tradition, I have the utter simplicity of my own little path. And instead of following dictates, it feels to me that the development and stages of meditation are intrinsically and deeply part of human nature. And I still just feel that no other path could have worked better for me. But I remain very interested in others experience of the benefits and obstacles of following in a tradition, versus the different degrees of a solitary path.