Verification for Trust

Feeling grateful being much outside of society, with my age and physical needs, having my first meal, a western on TV. When commercials come up, I happen to think. “ I have two dimensions of consciousness outside the norms” - A small Inner voice, quiet and brief, but seems so spot on; and the Outer communication of auspicious coincidence. Then, as I finish that thought, I am aware of just the end of a commercial, with the guy saying, “ You earned it!” But then, there is a third - emptiness of mind, without thought or concepts. And I feel how trusting it is to allow all of that! Which is stunning, since my path began with the feeling - There may be nothing at all that can really be trusted, when around me, my family was devastated by shocks. And yet, this growing trust in what is deep down. But there still remains, confusion I was fed from the beginning, and I added to - still some wandering in all of that. And another irony. With my solitude extended, by far beyond ever before, I wish for more opportunity to meditate, to catch false notions, and see their folly, before they spring out again, putting more trouble in all the sorrow around us.